Silent Treatment Page 18

  Helen was sitting at her desk as usual.

  'Morning Helen,' said Sarah with what she hoped was a well judged smile.

  'Morning Sarah,' said Helen.

  All perfectly normal.

  As Sarah sat down at her desk, her eyes rested on her monitor.

  'Morning Sarah,' said John as he appeared.

  He had the usual relaxed expression on his face.

  Sarah began to relax, the sense of normality felt comforting. She began to wonder if she had imagined yesterday.

  'How did it go yesterday?' said John. And Sarah's feeling of relief quickly evaporated.

  'Yesterday?' replied Sarah defensively.

  'Oh, I saw you with Gary and I wondered if you were doing anything special?'

  Now Sarah was beginning to feel uncomfortable, he couldn't possibly know could he?

  'Oh, just the usual, you know,' said Sarah, unconvincingly.

  No, she was sure he couldn't know, she was just being hypersensitive.

  Helen looked across at Sarah. She hadn’t told her about seeing John at the abbey ruins last night. What would she say anyway? She looked across at John. She was no longer fooled by the gentle demeanour he liked to portray. She had seen the expression on his face last night as he attempted to abduct the children.

  A nasty thought entered her head, wasn’t she trying to do the same thing? She tried to dismiss the thought, after all she had only been doing what she had been told to do.

  Sarah looked at her email, glad to have something else to look at apart from Helen and John.

  And there it was, an email from the director. Surely she had another day or two left before...Maybe it was just for a chat. But the tone was more insistent than normal.

  She sighed, picked up her papers and set off to the director’s office.

  'Come in Sarah,' said the voice from the other side of the door.

  Sarah composed herself, she had a short opening speech mentally prepared.

  The director was sitting at his desk, with his usual smile. That was as she had been expecting, and she found herself starting her prepared speech. But she stopped. Almost as soon as she began, she saw to the left of the director someone she recognised.

  Susan Brannigan sat there smiling pleasantly.

  Sarah hadn't met her before, but she certainly knew of her. Everyone in the field of psychology knew of her. Her reputation in trauma treatment was well established and the high profile cases she had been involved in were legendary. Quite frankly Sarah suddenly felt rather small and diminished.

  'Sarah I'd like you to meet Susan,' said the director.

  Susan stood up and said 'Pleased to meet you Sarah. I have heard a lot of good things about your work.'

  Sarah shook the outstretched hand and still feeling off balance said 'I've certainly heard a lot about your work.'

  'Please sit down Sarah,' said the director.

  Sarah sat down and felt even more like a pupil sitting in front of two teachers. Her prepared speech was now forgotten, and the mental image she had of how this meeting would go was now shattered.

  'I hope you don't mind, but I have been bringing Susan up to speed with how we are progressing,' said the director.

  'Why would you want to do that?' thought Sarah.

  'I thought the idea for the journals was very good,' said Susan.

  'Thank you,' said Sarah, still trying to work out what exactly was happening here. She didn't have to wait long to find out.

  The director looked directly at Sarah and said 'I thought it might be useful if we brought Susan on board. Another pair of eyes as it were. We are aware of the tremendous workload that you have had to take on.' He paused for a moment, leaned forward slightly and said 'And of course the strain that this has put you under. Which can make it difficult to make clear decisions sometimes.'

  Sarah was scrambling to understand what was going on and particularly what he had meant by his last comment. Had someone told him about the trip? Was someone in her department leaking information? Helen, John?

  'I'm doing fine,' said Sarah weakly.

  'I'm sure you are. We are both impressed with your work,' said the director. 'But we all need help sometimes.'

  'We thought it might be useful to go through the methods you have been using up to now. And maybe if there is another method that might bring results sooner, then we could try that,' said Susan reassuringly.

  Sarah knew this was a fait accompli. She had no real say in the decision, it had been made before she entered the room.

  'It could be useful I suppose,' said Sarah. What else could she say?

  'Perhaps we could find a time today to go through how we are progressing Sarah? Would in an hour be okay?' said Susan.

  Sarah smiled meekly, 'I'm sure that will be fine.'

  As Sarah closed the door behind her, she could see the director and Susan begin to talk together.

  'Are you alright Sarah?' It was Helen's voice and she seemed genuinely concerned.

  As Sarah sat down back at her desk she said wearily 'It looks like we are going to get some help.'

  'What sort of help?'

  'Susan Brannigan type of help,' replied Sarah.

  'Oh, I've read a lot of her work. She has had some real success in psychological trauma treatment. I was reading about one of her…'

  The expression on Sarah's face caused her to stop abruptly.

  Sarah sighed a little louder than she meant to. 'If we are being positive then she might bring some new ideas.'

  'And if we are being negative?' replied Helen.

  'Someone will be going through everything we have done so far with a fine tooth comb.'

  Helen paused. She hadn't thought this through. She replied in a hesitant voice 'Will she be looking at everything we have done?'

  Sarah lowered her voice, 'I don't think she needs to know about everything do you?'

  Helen was beginning to feel uncomfortable. Clearly Sarah was referring to the trip out with the children. She felt slightly conspiratorial as she said 'Perhaps she doesn’t need to know everything, just the important things.'

  And so a mini conspiracy of silence was formed.

  'Any help I can offer, just ask,' said Helen.

  With some relief, Sarah said 'Thanks. The meeting is set for in an hour. If you can think of anything that would be useful for the defence case then it would be welcome.'

  'Are we on trial then?'

  'I'm sure it won't come to that,' said Sarah.

  Helen returned to her desk and Sarah began preparing the case for the defence.

  For the second time today, Sarah felt like she was being summoned by a teacher at school. As Sarah and Helen walked into the meeting room they looked like two naughty schoolgirls. She had to remind herself that this was no longer school and the pair of them were well qualified psychologists.

  'Thanks for coming, please sit down,' said Susan.

  Sarah was relieved that the director wasn't there. At least she had numbers on her side.

  In front of her Susan had a mound of paper and files. Sarah had come armed with the journals.

  'Firstly I'd like to say we are impressed with the work you have done. With the tools at your disposal you really have done some sterling work.'

  'Thank you,' said Sarah preparing herself for the inevitable ’but’. She was also interested what she meant by ’tools’.

  'First things first. I notice that you have the journals with you. It would be very useful If you could let me have a look at them.' And with that she held out her hand to receive them.

  Sarah watched herself as she compliantly handed them to her.

  And with that she felt a wrench as she knew that the process of side lining her had begun.

  'I would be interested if you had thought of using any other approaches?' said Susan.

  The question sounded reasonable enough. Though Sarah had the feeling that Susan already had another approach in mind.

  'We do feel that the journals have opene
d up a path for a dialogue with the children,' said Sarah.

  'True. But it's been a few weeks now and we are no closer to knowing who they really are, beside the presumably fake names, and just as important what led them to suddenly appear.'

  The bluntness of her tone put Sarah on the back foot again.

  'With time we hope they may begin to open up more and feel comfortable enough to speak to us.'

  'If they are able to of course,' said Susan.

  It was something that Sarah had briefly considered before.

  'We discounted that early on. We didn't feel that as they are able to write at a high level, that they wouldn't be able to actually speak.'

  'The one doesn’t necessarily preclude the other,' said Susan.

  'Very true, but as I said we decided that it was unlikely.'

  Susan's head nodded. Sarah couldn't tell if it was in agreement or more of a shake of the head.

  'Now, I did find your recreation of where they appeared in the village interesting. Talk me thorough that.'

  Sarah relaxed slightly, it was something more concrete to talk about.

  'To be honest, we were trying to get a connection with something that had happened to them. Though I must admit that the reaction was a lot stronger than we had anticipated; it was at least a reaction.'

  Susan turned over a couple of papers on the desk and said 'What do you propose to try next to get them to talk?'

  Now Sarah felt uncomfortable again. She had no plan set out if she was honest. Or at least no plan that she wanted to tell Susan about.

  'Well, the journals…'

  'Are you expecting anything more revelatory to come out of them in the future?'

  'I think, that with time, we may be able to get them to become more specific.'

  'Ah, time, if only we had that available to us in an unlimited quantity.'

  'I'm aware of the high profile nature of our work.' said Sarah.

  Susan gave her a look that suggested that she didn't know the half of it.

  For a split second Sarah almost panicked and blurted out that Ben was at this very moment looking into the place that the children had appeared from. But she stopped herself. She may be a little confused at this moment in time; but she was crystal clear that she didn't want anyone else knowing about what Ben was doing.

  Susan removed her reading glasses and stared straight at Sarah. Sarah's anxiety levels rose as she felt that they had reached the crux of the meeting.

  'You know, there are other approaches available. I have had great success with them in the past. Some of my best results have been from using a drug based treatment. Particularity with traumatised children,' continued Susan.

  'But do we know they have been traumatised?' blurted out Helen.

  Susan turned her gaze at Helen and said calmly 'I think that as we have a group of children who are refusing to talk, then it certainly can't be dismissed as a possibility. It is a very common reaction to extreme trauma.'

  Helen sat back feeling like she was about twelve years old.

  Sarah had seen firsthand what administering drug treatment could do. She had wanted to avoid it at all costs.

  'My recommendation would be that we start a course of drugs immediately. With one of the children and using the rest of them as a control group.'

  'What if they don't want to take the drugs?' said Sarah, feeling that the battle was already lost.

  'Oh, I wasn't proposing to tell them what they are taking. It can easily be administered in the food.'

  'You have it all worked out then,' said Helen, recovering her voice.

  'It's not the first time I have undertaken this kind of work Helen,' said Susan with a smile that seemed to pat her on the head and say ’There, there’.

  Susan closed the file in front of her, a clear indication that the meeting was over.

  'Thank you both for coming. I'm sure we can all work together in the best interests of the children.'

  The clear inference to Sarah was that if they didn't want to carry out the work, then they were welcome to leave the treatment.

  Sarah wanted to say so much but she knew that it would only come out as an incoherent sound.

  Susan stood up and Sarah and Helen felt compelled to follow suit, and leave the meeting room.

  As Sarah closed the door behind her Helen said 'She is rather, formidable isn't she?'

  ‘That's one word for her,' replied Sarah.

  'Still, we have our new treatment. We should try to make it work as best as possible.' Sarah wasn't sounding very convincing even to herself.

  Helen said 'It may work after all.'

  Sarah half smiled. 'You never know.'

  ‘Sarah, could I have a word please?’ The director had appeared from behind Sarah

  He indicated they should go into the meeting room. Sarah had an awful feeling as she imagined being in the room with both the director and Susan. But the door opened and Susan emerged.

  ‘Don’t mind me,’ and she breezed past them and left the room. Sarah felt instantly a little more relieved, the director she could cope with, but Susan was another matter.

  ‘Sit down Sarah, how do you think it went with Susan?’

  Sarah knew she must remain professional. ‘It was interesting to actually meet her, and she had some interesting ideas,’ she said, hoping that she wouldn’t say interesting again for a while.

  ‘Good, I’m glad you are okay with her coming on board,’ said the director.

  Sarah kept quiet but couldn't hide her dejection.

  ‘How are you feeling in yourself Sarah?’

  Sarah replied carefully ‘Okay, I guess, we are very busy and there does seem to be a bit of pressure now.’

  The director’s face became one of complete and deep concern as he leant forward and said in a low voice ‘I agree the pressure can get a bit much at times, what with our friends camped outside. Which is why having Susan here to share the load will be so useful.’

  He leant back and said ‘You know, I wonder if you should have a couple of days off, to recharge the batteries as it were. It would allow Susan to get acquainted with what has been happening here and to catch up. What do you think? You are due some leave, you still have ten days to take off and your last break was over two months ago.’

  Sarah’s mind raced, she was already being eased out. No, not eased, pushed.

  The director continued ‘Just a couple of days. Initially. Just to see how the new treatment goes.’

  Sarah realised he had already worked it all out. He knew her holidays and this all felt planned. What else could she say?

  ‘Well, I suppose – ’

  ‘Good, good,’ he said before she had even managed to finish her sentence, ‘and then when you get back, if everything is okay, then, well, we’ll see how it goes. Thanks for understanding Sarah.’

  ‘And the journals?’

  ‘Oh don’t worry about them, we’ll deal with them from now on.’

  He looked directly at her and his look almost had the effect of levitating her out of her chair as she watched herself stand up, smile and leave through the door.

  As she shut the door behind herself, she felt as if a weight had been lifted from her with the removal of the responsibility for the children; but then she thought of them and what might happen to them and the weight was replaced with a feeling of dread.

  Chapter Twenty Eight

  As Sarah wandered back towards her desk, there was also the stark realisation that she may not have many more chances to see the children

  The thought filled her with despair. But it also made her think how she should gain one more chance before her enforced leave.

  She couldn't organise a session like she had before; Susan would hear about it and then that would be the end of it. She needed to see the children without anyone else from the institute knowing. She knew her sway was limited now; she couldn't rely on Helen and John. There was only one person she hoped she could rely on.

  She turned away
from her route to her desk and headed towards Gary’s room. 'How's things? I heard that we have a new boss,' said Gary as she approached.

  Hearing it put as bluntly as this confirmed to Sarah that she hadn't been paranoid. She thought about trotting out the line 'She has just come in to help us'. But even she didn't believe it anymore.

  'You heard about that then?'

  'We hear more than you might think. Even at our lowly level.'

  'I'm sure you do. Perhaps I should get my information from you from now on.' She was only half joking.

  Gary looked unnaturally serious as he said 'I can keep an ear out for you if you like?'

  Sarah matched his seriousness and in a low tone said 'I could do with all the friends I can get at the moment. So anything you hear…'

  'Understood,' said Gary, maintaining his seriousness.

  Sarah forced herself to remember why she had come down here.

  'There is one thing you could do for me Gary. I'd like you to gather the children together so I can talk to them. The thing is..' she hesitated for a moment. She was still an employee of the institute and Gary was also. 'I'd like to keep this between just us.' She wasn't sure how he would react. After all, he didn't owe here any debt of allegiance. She thought that they got on well, but she wondered if this might be pushing it too far.

  'Not a problem. Where and when?' said Gary.

  She was relieved to hear this. At least she still had one ally in the institute.

  'Not the main meeting rooms. The old institute building?' It was where Sarah had met Helen before and seemed to fit the bill.

  Gary nodded.

  'It's not exactly plush. But it is away from prying eyes,' said Sarah. 'How soon can you manage it?'

  'Now be alright?' said Gary.

  'Fine,' said Sarah feeling a little unprepared. But she didn't know if she would ever get another chance.

  'I'll have them there in ten minutes then,' he said and left the room.

  Sarah decided to go straight there so as to avoid seeing anyone that might recognise her. She couldn’t face Helen or John and especially Susan at the moment. As she skulked through the corridors and outside she felt almost like a criminal. The formerly impressive entrance of the old institute was just ahead and she looked round nervously to check if anyone else was around. Not surprisingly she was alone. She pushed the main door open and made her way down the corridor. Peering in at the rooms that were either side she couldn't help thinking of the less enlightened treatments that may have taken place here. Though she disagreed with the drug treatment that Susan was going to use, at least it didn't involve shocking the patient with high voltage electricity. As she pushed at the partially opened door, she could see what she had been looking for. In the corner was a table and several chairs stacked neatly in the corner.